I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
