Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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