she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
You're like the curious george of whores
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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