if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
