Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I will be naked everywhere
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
