so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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