For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
