Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
