I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
my liver is dry heaving
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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