Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Tornado booty call.. dedication
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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