i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
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