He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
