Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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