Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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