i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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