so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
She tied me up with her honor cords...
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
