I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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