Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize