My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
