shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
