I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I'm getting married
To pizza
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
