Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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