Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
