told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
