she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
i've created a new STD.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
