my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
You're like the curious george of whores
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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