More tranny stories later!
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
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