I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize