Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
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