I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Randomize
