if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
He better not be in your backpack
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
