i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
