I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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