Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
