love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
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