highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
