I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
