Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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