I just saw a hot homeless man
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize