What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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