; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
