so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
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