that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
