can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
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