the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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