Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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