I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
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