So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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