it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Randomize
