took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
He's on the porch naked. Help.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
