it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Randomize
