matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize